An Unnecessary Addition to the Christ the Redeemer Statue

The Christ the Redeemer statue in Rio de Janeiro is one of the more incredible things to see in this kerfuffle we call life. I’m a fit and able human being and I have no problem climbing some steps to see something so impressive. And besides, there’s a train most of the way up, use of which is encouraged.

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But less fit and able people should also be able to see such marvels of the world. Within reason, efforts should be made to make things like the Christ statue more accessible to those less able. The powers that be in Rio agreed with me so they installed an elevator from the end of the train line that goes most of the way from the bottom of the mountain to the top, to the platform at the statue. Job done. Everyone’s happy.

Wait, what’s that?

It’s something.

No. Surely not. What have they done?

Why have they done that?

Moving stairs. An escalator. Running up the side of the Christ the Redeemer platform. Why? Who is it for??

It’s not made for people who can walk up stairs, because those people have stairs they can walk up. It’s not made for people who need elevators, because those people have an elevator they can use. It’s made for…disabled claustrophobic people? People who had a freak accident in which a malfunctioning elevator severed their legs and are consequently now afraid of elevators and also unable to walk?

If anyone knows why this escalator exists, please tell me (wild speculation also welcome). In the meantime, I’m going to go and pray to Jesus that his statue in Rio collapses and kills every damn person on that escalator.

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2 Comments Add yours

  1. Anonymous says:

    I think that sense of humour is hereditary.

    Like

  2. Anonymous says:

    Maybe some Paralympians fit the bill. I’m thinking little legs.

    Like

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